Expressions, through words-
I say what I feel,
but I am still shut out.
Clots of agony-
showing me what's real;
provide proof of what I'm about.
Confusion that's personal-
a series of private ordeals,
so many, I'm afraid, I've lost count.
Organizations of 'knowledge' -
sermons of counsel as I kneel,
while my internal voices continue to shout.
Negotiations of mistrust-
the closing of a dangerous deal,
mock pleasantries laced with doubt.
Silent cries and screams-
Unable to escape my mind's seal,
the starvation of being without.
Meaningless promises of salvation-
Patiently awaiting the turn of Karma's wheel,
to serve on him this draught.
My solemn retreat into darkness-
to where they no longer can steal
my soul as it was my entire life, throughout.
An existence, only mine-
In isolation, the fragility I reveal,
for once out, one cannot again be shut out.
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